You · Scatter · Like · Stars

Colorblind --the dresden dolls

i love you like a brother
and i love you like a child
and i love you like a lover
and i love you dumb and colorblind
and i love you like a mother
even after all you've done
and i love you like no other
but i know
youre not the one...

and i loved you in bright orange
and in violet and in green
and i loved you in such colors
as your eyes have never ever seen
and i loved the way you acted
but your one trick pony's dead
and i loved you unprotected
but you only love in
red

i know its dark for good
i never listen when i should
you only see in black and white
so go on back to your own kind
and i'll go back to mine

i love you like a brother
and i love you like a child
and i love you like a lover
and i love you dumb and colorblind
and i love you like a mother
even after all she's done
and i love you like no other
but i know youre not the one...


[ for anthony ]

Feelin' Like:	nostalgic
Rockin' out to:	the dresden dolls- colorblind

trace me over
but dont scratch the paint
im wondering
where is the eyes in ice & 
freezing breath on window [fresh] panes
Just to be left
I am the most delicate [but stero-typical narcosis]
I tinge the fact that i take my own sound mind
& refuse to quiet its ruptured spleen
set fingers [slip] to leave [stay] but replace [subdue] & relent
I am whats ticking in your ears 
so awnser [wink me a song]
when i call your barcode a silly act of breaking the stone
barriers will be missed
& siren lipsincs will be interpreted
[wail for a birth right & a chance to gobble the beast]
alive
& not attempted 
not acquitted [nor properly outdated]
i feel so
inadequate



fuck i love him..
& i cant even write for him anymore...

Feelin' Like:	blank
Rockin' out to:	the yeah yeah yeahs-warrior

what the fuck is wrong with me??
i cant cut myself open hoping to find an outlet anymore.
i dont know where my head is at anymore.. and him calling didn't help the fucking situation when i was devasted over him NOT calling.

GOD I FUCKING HATE HIM !!!!

[its easier to blame him for everything...]

Feelin' Like:	weird
Rockin' out to:	Joni Mitchell-Case Of You

delete
i paused this moment
rewinded
and deleted
every memory that was containing any
love
or adoration towards you

on the way down
he kept promising to bring me back up
only to talk of winter love
and summer springs
with magnolia eyes
browning at the edges
with simpering sweet tests of time
on the way
by the way
i couldn't make it..

Where Am I?:	home
Feelin' Like:	crushed
Rockin' out to:	Alanis Morrissett

Oh I'll twine with my mingles and waving black hair
With the roses so red and the lilies so fair
And the mirtles so bright with the emerald dew
The pale and the leader and eyes look like blue

I will dance I will sing and my laugh shall be gay
I will charm every heart in each crown I will sway
When I woke from my dreaming my idols were clay
All portions of love had all blown away

Oh he taught me to love him and promised to love
And to cherish me over all others above
How my heart is now wondering no misery can tell
He's left me no warning no words of farewell

Oh he taught me to love him and call me his flower
That was blooming to cheer him through life's dreary hour
Oh I long to see him and regret the dark hour
He's gone and neglected his pale wildwood flower

So be it, I'm your crowbar
If thats what I am so far
Until you get out of this mess
And I will pretend
That I dont know of your sins
Until you are ready to confess
But all the time, all the time
I'll know, I'll know
And you can use my skin
To bury your secrets in
And I will settle you down
And at my own suggestion,
I will ask no questions
While I do my thing in the background
But all the time, all the time
i'll know, I'll know
Baby-I can't help you out, while she's still around
So for the time being, I'm being patient
And amidst this bitterness
If you'll consider this-even if it dont make sense
All the time-give it time
And when the crowd becomes your burden
And you've early closed your curtains,
I'll wait by the backstage door
While you try to find the lines to speak your mind
And pry it open, hoping for an encore
And if it gets too late, for me to wait
For you to find you love me, and tell me so
It's ok, dont need to say it

Feelin' Like:	cold
Rockin' out to:	Clenching Fists

Besides. i have a niece on the way. what kind of story would they'd have to make up to her if i was gone?

All i know is.. i want a boyfriend and i want to cuddle with someone who cares.. not with someone who cant be here.

Feelin' Like:	lonely
Rockin' out to:	6 Underground--Sneaker Pimps